Texts from Tony

(He'd had rice earlier in the day for lunch :)

Meow

Conversation with my little brother:

Fainting spell

Conversation via iMessage with my brother, Tony:

Tony: Meow I fainted when I got my blood drawn today :0 They had to take me to emergency room on a wheel chair
Me: What. Elaborate plz. I want full story
Tony: Meow scariest thing in my life. Kk so I go into station room thingy and I sooooOoOoOoOo scared right. Kaiser room.
Me: Uh huh
Tony: And so they about to stick needle in so I was like wait plz then I take out this hamster that Jessica (Jane's note: Jessica is his girlfriend) let me borrow to squeeze. So I look away and I’m squeezing the hamster right, and I feel the needle go in and my blood being drawn. The nurse tried to keep my attention away from it by trying to make conversation with me, so she asked me random questions like what my fav sport is
Me: Mmhm
Tony: And so I was talking and then I just stopped cuz I felt my mind and my vision were being blurred out. And I felt like I needed to throw up. And then I was apparently unresponsive. They tried asking me questions but I was gazing into space, so they say.
Me: Whoa
Tony: Then they call down a security and doctor and other ppl down. This lady gave me apple juice.
Me: Hahahaha where was papa
Tony: They made me lay down and they put ice packs behind my neck, on my forehead, and on my chest. Then I started violently shaking or shivering o.O;;  Then they rolled me into wheelchair and brought me upstairs to emergency room. I was all agdsdshda. Omfg and they poked me with a needle and squeezed it when I was gazing. I FELT THAT
Me: HAHAHAHAHA
Tony: I wanted to throw my hamster at them but I couldn’t!
Me: So you were still holding hamster after all this time
Tony: Btw I never let go of the hamster during this whole thing. Ya. And so they hooked me up to some beeping machine, and took my temp, blood pressure and stuff, and made me lay down for a bit. I couldn’t move my body without shaking and my breathing was weird o.o So I lay down for some more and we left and went home and dad made me red noodle cuz I still can’t use my left arm that well.
Tony: Meow now I’m laying down in bed about to get up to eat some Milano cookies and surf da interwebz :3
Tony: Dassit meng 

The hamster

Bro and his pillow pets

My brother has four pillow pets -- a panda, ladybug, mama unicorn and baby unicorn -- and has starting bringing his pillow pets, one at a time, to school with him. He is a high-school senior. Should I be worried?

This is a text message he sent to me today with the accompanying photo:

"Panda chillin with me in Spanish class :D"

Brothers

One of my favorite photographs: Here is my brother, Tony, (he was 10 years old at the time) with our newly adopted bunny, Duncan, who quickly became a beloved family member.

"Get well soon" card

My brother, Tony, makes the best cards. Here is a card he drew today for my sister, who is home sick with a cold.

Customer service

I knew I’d started to cross the threshold into adulthood when my dad began enlisting me to do the grown-up job of ordering on my own during meal outings, and dealing with customer support over the telephone (with the punks at Verizon, for example). Now I can appreciate all the practice because I can more confidently navigate conversations with pricky customer service representatives and hold my own.

About two years ago, I’d been ill (from the flu, probably) and home-bound for too many days than I could tolerate and so made my first public appearance in several days at the mall. I could not care less about shopping -- all I wanted was some frozen yogurt at Yogen Fruz. So, I stood in line patiently and salivating for about 10 minutes, and asked for a small regular frozen yogurt, no toppings. When the girl turned around from the frozen-yogurt machine, I saw that she’d dispensed only a skinny, hollow cone of frozen yogurt into my cup. What a cheap-o.

“I’m not getting any toppings, so may I please have some more frozen yogurt?” I inquired? The stingy employee looked at me, dumbfounded. “What?” she asked, at a loss at what to do but obviously not inclined to honor my request. “Then I don’t want it,” I snapped. The girl then looked at me as if to say, “Are you serious?”

I was. So I walked off.

Clearly, a hungry, sickly Jane is not to be reckoned with. But if I’m paying $6 for plain frozen yogurt without the embellishments, I want, at the very least, decent customer service.

My sister, Amy, says the the bunny up front has my "waiting" face. The bunny towards the back has Tony's "I'm up to no good" face.

My brother asks a girl to prom

Voice of an angel haha

1/3 birthday card

How cute is this 1/3-birthday card that my brother Tony made for Amy?

"Dear John"

My 18-year-old brother's ringing endorsement for Nicholas Sparks' Dear John:

Tony:   10:49 pm

    oh mang
    dat buk
    so gud

    could not put it downz
    we supposed to be reading twelfth night in english
    no screw that
    it's dear john time

Ringtones

While my brother was talking to one of his former math teachers:

My brother's thoughts on the 2012 Oscars

Boys.

Valentine's Day poem

By Tony Ma

Yeah, I am no prince charming.
My personality's bitter,
My messy hair's alarming.
But guuuuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrrrl,
The way you swing those hips
Has made me fall in love!
Your lips with mint chapstick--
I can't get enough of!
Your smarts, your beauty, your design
Has changed me --  my looks,
My hair ... all of which, now well-defined.
So I ask you now to be mine, 
For this day, maybe even more,
To be my beloved valentine.

Texts from my brother

The real story (from my sister, Amy):

"He ran towards his bedroom door to run to the kitchen to make hot cocoa and opened the door on his toe. He probably scraped some skin off."

Fuzzy fads

My dad trotted into my perpetually chilly basement bunker last week to find me cocooned in my cartoon monkey-print Snuggie while I watched Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. I turned my head, awkwardly smiling (it was much too late to toss the Snuggie out of sight), nearly crimson-faced with embarrassment. He said: "You bought a Snuggie? Can I try it on? OooooOoooOo one size fits all, huh?" Hm.

This reveals two things about me: I have a closeted proclivity for Bravo reality shows and an appreciation for quirky, cuddly fads.

Before you give me the stink eye, I think Snuggies are really practical. Although not particularly thick, mine (actually, I gifted the Snuggie to my older sister, but she doesn't appreciate it as much as I do) keeps me warm and there's even a lazy lion pocket up front to keep your snacks in! The only tricky part is folding the blanket (although I am admittedly rubbish at folding awkwardly shaped objects, such as elastic-bottom bed sheets, button-up dress shirts, etc.) so it doesn't sit in an untidy heap in the living room.

And then there are pillow pets. At some point, my older sister Amy had acquired six pillow pets during the holiday season to gift to our younger cousins (see a photo of her pillow pet totem pole here), and my 18-year-old brother Tony conned her into giving him the coveted ladybug pillow pet for Christmas. Amy, if you're reading this, I really want the moose ;D.

But adult onsies (also known as the 'Forever Lazy') equipped with a rear zippered hatch is not my cup of tea.

Meet the love of Tony's life: Ruby.

Guide to NYC's Chinatown

Even though my family and I come up to New York City every summer, I still find the city as captivating as ever.  One of my favorite places in the city, though, happens to be Chinatown, where I always stock up on buns with a variety of fillings, such as sweetened coconut, pineapple, or roast pork.  Here are my favorite stops:

Chinatown Ice Cream Factory (65 Bayard St. between Mott and Elizabeth Streets)
Red bean, green tea, and avocado are some of the exotic flavors available at this ice cream shop, in addition to the more recognizable flavors like strawberry, coffee, and pistachio.  Though the surly teenage employees working behind the counter as a major turn off, the underwhelming service is soon forgetten once you taste the creamy and velvety — though not overly rich — ice cream.  And even at $3.75 for one scoop, this place is always busy with a surprisingly diverse following, which is asure sign of delectable treats ahead.  The best flavors I’ve tried are green tea and red bean.  Definitely a must-stop if you’re in the city andwell worth the splurge.

Dragon Land Bakery (125 Walker St. between Centre and Baxter Streets)
Of all the bakeries I’ve tried in NYC’s Chinatown, this one has the best sweet buns.  I recommend the pineapple, coconut, and red bean buns, as well as the fluffy Asian cupcakes.  I wouldn’t recommend venturing away from the Asian delectables though: both the fruit tart and chocolate cheesecake are severly lacking in both texture and flavor.  In fact, thechocolate cheesecake was mysteriously rubbery when I tried it.  The only problem I’ve found, though, is that many of the sweet buns are decorated similarly, so it’s hard to decifer which flavor is which once you bring them home.

Century Cafe (123 Bowery St. between Grand and Hester Streets)
This is one of the larger bakeries in Chinatown on the less popular side of Canal St., but it has plenty of seating (unlike many of its counterparts).  The biggest draw is the steamed pork (cha xiu) buns, which come piping hot from the steamer.  You can even buy them in bulk, freeze them, and then steam them yourself at home.  This particular bakery is also uniquein that it serves savory entrees, such as a combination of stir-friedvegetables pork for just over $3 for a generous serving.  It’s certainlybetter than any deal I’ve seen on Rachel’ Ray’s $40 a Day. 

My little brother, Tony, with his companion: the papaya

(Originally posted Aug. 23, 2010)

My Little Tony

Tony, my spunky 16-year old brother, is a hopeless romantic who packs a lot of personality in a twiggy little frame.  At any given moment, he can be found with a bottle of orange soda in hand, or singing in his boy band voice, which, interestingly enough, dips several octaves when guests are around.  He also has a strong distaste for Amy’s old lady music, and any situation that threatens boredom.  And though he is not immune to the dramatic outbursts typical of those in his age group, he has a gentle affinity for cute, furry little animals (especially bunnies).  Oh, and his favorite movie is The Little Mermaid.  (Though I probably shouldn’t publically annouce that.)

Real Conversations with the One and Only:

Conversation at Staples shopping for school supplies:
Amy: You know you want this notebook (points to one with a golden lab puppy on it)
Tony: No!!!  I’d want the one with Ariel on it, she’s hot! (grins) 

From Amy’s Facebook status:
Amy is upset with the ending of Dear John
- Tony’s comment: noob lemme borrow
- Amy: Jane’s jealous, she wants in on our Nicholas Sparks partay
- Tony: huh? my friend wanted to borrow it not me
- Amy: …I even hand delivered it to his room earlier and he seemed to excited
- Tony: no, I called you a noob and roared at you til you left
- Amy: so roaring = accepting book with a cheesy smile
- Tony: you didn’t have your glasses on
- Amy: I’m taking it back!
- Tony: I hid it

More IMs:
Jane: eww don’t put the image of a shirtless tony in my head
Tony: you know te gusta

On applying for summer jobs:
Tony: they better hire me D:
  I’d be a good bagger
  and orange stocker
  and apple shiner
  :0
  and cart pusher
  and elderly helper
  and free sample loader

This is the third of a 10-part series of the condensed Tumblr Challege, which involves 10 consecutive entries on different individuals.  Normal entries will resume soon.

(Originally posted July 21, 2010)

They call her Amzy

My older sister, Amy, has no sense of anyone’s comfort bubble, or rather is aware, but wholly disregards it (and in fact takes pleasure in making every and all situations awkward).  Her hobbies include tending her thriving Facebook Zoo, catching up on pop culture, and being a part-time vegetarian.  Moreover, we share a common obsession with shows likeSay Yes to the Dress, and entertain one another by doing eerily accurate immitations of our parents.

Amy’s Most Overused Phrases:
1. “Sup? Sup??”
2. “Ah! A nub!”
3. “Where’s my nub spray?”

A Glimpse in our Facebook Wall-to-Wall: 

Amy > Jane: Tony kept punching me in the arm yesterday claiming that muscles don’t have feelings. Mine does. Now I’m sick. 

Amy > Jane: You tagged me as Tony’s pokemon lizard???
- Jane’s Comment: It was your doppelganger 

Amy > Jane: You are my ☼shine

Jane > Amy: NO MORE FB ZOO
- Amy’s comment: Jealous?? I have 3 islands now, THREE!! 

Jane > Amy: Tony: “She almost made me kiss her yesterday but i blocked her face with my cube.”

Amy > Jane: I woke up coughing today so Papa went out and bought me some cough syrup. Papa tells me to go take my cough medicine and you can hear LS (Little Snoob) running to the kitchen from his room going “waaaait! I want to watch!” Why is it that we all gather around to watch the other potato take their medicine/use their inhaler? 

Amy > Jane: I just saw some guy whip out a bottle of purell and rubbed his hands together at the library - naturally I thought of you. 

Jane > Amy: Stop. Taking. Quizzes.
Amy > Jane: Stop.Being.Mean.to.Me.Sad face

This is the second of a 10-part series of the condensed Tumblr Challege, which involves 10 consecutive entries on different individuals.  Normal entries will resume shortly.

(Originally posted July 20, 2010)

Wall-to-wall

Excerpts from the Facebook wall-to-wall between my 16-year old brother and me:

January 30, 2010:
Jane > Tony: Keep your grimy hands off my Pokemon cards.

December 30, 2009: (10:39 pm)Jane > Tony: Papa told me to maintain a safe distance from you as long as you have the sniffles (just to be safe), so this is how we’re going to have to communicate for the next couple days.

*Wi-five!*

October 5, 2009: After seeing tagged photos of him on tacky day
Jane > Tony: WAS THAT MY HEADBAND YOU WORE ON TACKY DAY??

June 26, 2009:
Jane > Tony: We’re watching your favorite movie tonight :)
…followed by Madagascar tomorrow night.
(let’s see which animal most resembles Amy hahahaha)
Tony’s comment: the hippo

(Originally posted June 27, 2010)